Tuesday, April 26, 2011

First meeting with "Authority"

I met with Little-A's 5th grade teacher yesterday morning.  I wanted to let her know we were going to home learn next year and even though she wouldn't be responsible for him anymore I really wanted her opinion on how to make this transition smoother for him.

I have to say that I was nervous about this meeting.  I've read so many bad experiences that parents have had all across America when they remove their children from school.  I'd steeled myself for a confrontation (even though his teacher is amazing).  It turns out that I was worried needlessly.  His teacher was very supportive of our decision and had some great ideas.  She expressed some concern about his need for socialization and I acknowledged it.  We brainstormed some ideas to make sure he got the high level he needs.

I face a challenge with him and home learning.  Everyone worries that home schooled kids aren't socialized....and they just worry about regular socialization.  Little-A is an extremely social child.  He thrives on person to person contact.  In fact, if you'll remember in a previous post, his biggest concern was that he'd never see his friends.  This bothered him so much that he was close to tears.  If he doesn't get enough socialization, he gets depressed and starts acting out.

I'm a great mom and because I am, I'm well aware of his "special" need of extra socialization.  It's going to be a challenge, and more then likely it's going to be exhausting for me (I'm not a social creature - except online - and I'm very introverted.  The complete opposite of him) but because I'm an awesome mom, I'm going to continually push myself outside of my comfort zone to make sure his needs get met.  I'm also going to have to find extra ways for me to be alone so I can recharge.

His teacher also gave me the website to find the state standards to make sure he stays on track in case I decide to send him back to PS.

As I've said before...he's always had exemplary teachers and I've always been grateful and appreciative of them.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

A breakthrough!

I finally go through to Little-A yesterday.  We were sitting down for a nice Ramen dinner (which he fixed for us) and I casually asked him a simple question.

"If you could learn anything in the world you wanted...what would you want to learn?"

He said he wanted to learn how to take care of animals to help him in college when he's studying to be a Veterinarian.  When I told him we could learn everything there was to learn about it I saw that spark in his eyes.

You know that spark....your kid gets it after days/weeks/months of fighting you on something that you know is a good idea and you'd bet your life that they'd enjoy it but they disagree with you either on principle or simply because they can't see the bigger picture.  You try every way you possibly can to get their interest.  You beg, plead, cajole, threaten, put your foot down, ignore, and even bribe...but they still won't give in.  

Then comes that one innocent moment.  You probably didn't even plan it.  It just happened....and it finally clicks in their head.  "Wow!  Mom might be right....this could be fun!"

That's the look I was waiting for and I could see his brain working and thinking about all the possibilities that one answer held.

He's totally into my idea now ;)

He did ask how he'd know if he was learning and if he'd get grades so I agreed to give him tests and grades if and when he wanted them.   Oh, and we've decided to not call it home"schooling" and instead we're calling it home "learning".

On a side note,  I'm really looking forward to starting D's learning.  I think he'd love learning how to do computer programing so I'm going to start him on that.

This is me excited 

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Never thought it would happen to me.

My friends decided to play "devil's advocate" today and proceed to tell me that I had no clue what I'm getting into and Little-A is going to be an unsocialized freak who will never be a functioning member of society....simply because I'm taking him out of school.  One of these friend's cited the few homeschooled kids he knew, as did another.  One friend said he had a background in teaching so he knew what he was talking about.

These friends are barely into their 20's and NONE of them have kids of their own. 

I listened to them in the beginning, because they are my friends.  I tried to have a conversation about it, to let them know that yes I do realize this is going to be difficult; yes I know my reasons for taking Little-A out of public school are primarily selfish; no, I never said either way of schooling is better...it's just different; and damnit, NO...homeschooled kids are NOT unsocialized lepers!  And for the record, I have more teaching experience than the previous mentioned friend.  

They didn't listen.  They kept changing their words to say the same thing.  I told them to stop, that while I respected their opinions, this was my decision and I wasn't going to accept any negativity about it and that the conversation was over.  It didn't stop.   I left.  I hope that my son never hears cruel words like that because if he does, he'll never come around to the joy we can experience on this journey.

I'd like to say that those will be the last tears I shed over this matter, but I'm a lot more realistic then that.

Why I decided to do it.

First of all, I'm not exactly the type of person you would expect to homeschool.  I'm a single mom, a full-time student, and I don't have a job....but I love my boys and I want what's best for them.  Let me explain something right away.  My older son...my hummingbird, D...has had difficulty in the public school system ever since 1st grade.  He doesn't have the type of personality that thrives in that atmosphere....and he's suffering for it.  My younger son, Little-A, has never had any issues in school.  He's always been on honor roll, he's had stupendous teachers, great schools, and even better friends.

So why do I want to pull my son out of what appears to be something good for him?  It's selfish, and I know it.  I want to spend more time with my baby before he gets too old to want to hang out with me.  I want to experience him as the wonderful kid he is.  I want to be able to explore the world through his amazing eyes....and I want to do it before the public school system drains the creativity from him.

I want the same for D but it will be different for him because he's already going into 9th grade.  He's at the age where he's trying to be an adult but isn't exactly sure how.  I want to be his role model.  I want him to understand that learning shouldn't be stressful or something you have to do.  Learning should be fun and exciting and something you do every day simply because that's how life is.

D is ready...this goes without question.  Little-A is fighting me tooth and nail.  His biggest concern is that he'll never see his friends again.  He won't accept when I say he will, just not every day.  He wants to experience Middle School (he's going into 6th grade).  He doesn't want to be the new kid again and have to make new friends.

Am I nervous?  Yes....but I have faith in my abilities as a mother and a teacher and I know that my boys will turn out alright.  I believe in myself and my children....and my ability to find help when I get lost.

I'm also realistic.  I know it's not always going to be sunshine and rainbows, especially since they've both been in the PS school system for so long.  There's going to be a long period of deschooling before we start.  I'm prepared for this, and so far I've gotten nothing but encouragement.

Here's hoping it continues.